June 18, 2017

Here's the biggest sport in the world that you're in charge of, please fuck it up for us

Really. https://www.thecable.ng/football-rule-making-body-proposes-60-minutes-matches. Never mind over 10 years of resisting technology to stop travesties in things the referee didn't or didn't want to see occurring. Never mind being blind to video assistance while always remembering to take giant bribes. No, apparently what we want from FIFA is making football matches 2/3 of the length. Putin, Trump, FIFA are all supposedly democratically chosen in some way. It may not be the Cold War, but it doesn't feel much more equitable or reasonable. Anyway, the Cold War did have one thing in its favour: very few Russians got out of their shitty country.

May 14, 2017

No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!

Have a couple of million to spare? The country not getting wrecked fast enough for your liking? Why not use your hard-pilfered loot to try to oust democratically-elected MPs who haven't yet changed their tune on Brexit? It's a free country, isn't it? Surely, it's up to the individual whether to spend their surplus hoard on skewing an election or building a secret base inside a volcano.

December 03, 2016

Kick them when they're down, why don't you?

El Daily Heil no sabe nada. Can't believe this wasn't picked up, but then ironic juxtaposition isn't exactly their strongest suit.

November 10, 2016

Yes, it's the Nazi comparison. Bear with me.

I'm aware that invoking Godwin's Law at this time needs extreme justification, but I think there's one angle that I haven't seen anyone pick up on yet. Namely, the choice between Hindenburg and Hitler in 1933 was a much more forgivable situation for the electorate to make a grievous mistake on than what has just happened. Most of the populace had a lack of any real media access, the economic situation was truly dire with starvation only a stone's throw away for many, the whole world was far less culturally tolerant and the trauma and injustice of recent history hung heavy over it all. On top of that, one side employed actual widespread violence to bend opinion.
Yet Hitler didn't actually win the election. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

June 24, 2016

Apathy in the UK

So, the fearful disenfranchised have voted against the educated and we're now heading out of an institution that curbed the worst excesses of successive Tory governments against them through protective legislation. Regardless of how any individual may justify their grounds for this act of blithe stupidity, it's the immigration issue and it's corrosive effect on uncomprehending minds that has won the day, as if leaving the EU will somehow furnish all those discontents with jobs they were never qualified for in the first place. Rather than meaning that in the long run, there'll be fewer jobs to go around, with the economy going up the Swannee.
It should, nevertheless, not escape anyone's attention that a voter turnout of 72%, while high in comparison to the pathetic totals for recent national, council and EU elections, is depressingly low for the most important vote most people are ever likely to have cast. That the polls got it so badly wrong is surely a result of the mass of the undecided taking the easy way out by staying at home, what with the weather being a bit inclement, leaving it up to other people to decide their future. I find this possibly even more depressing than the size of the Leave vote that materialised.
Now, the two European holidays I'm taking in the next few months have just got about 7% more expensive since yesterday. I'm off to town to find the first group of people who look pleased with themselves and demand my money back off them.

May 31, 2016

Right exit

Ubiquitous mildewy care-in-the-community hangout of choice Wetherspoon's have finally done the right thing and made it easy for punters to go next door instead, even if the place next door is just another Oxfam shop. If only all consumer choices were made so simple.

March 29, 2016

Taking the Piss

If only this was a case of April Fool's pranksters jumping the gun...but no, while their country as a whole rolls steadily towards the end of its brief spell as a semi-functional democracy, it seems that some navel-gazing Americans have quite other priorities in the name of political correctness. And why? So that the estimated 0.3% of the populace identifying themselves as transgender can be spared discomfort at male/female labels, while anyone who doesn't speak English who's unfortunate enough to need the toilet in those buildings will be soiling themselves in the corridor while trying to work out with a dictionary what the hell 'stalls' (or indeed 'restroom') means.
No matter, once Trump gets in, toilets will sensibly be relabelled 'Whites' and 'Coons' again. Can't wait.